Be happy, be peaceful ... Vipassana

Let me start briefly at the end ... what an incredible experience! Vipassana is at many points difficult, invigorating, challenging, peaceful, mind-twisting. So many ways to feel the many sensations. So knowing the end, let me try to describe the daily meanderings (hopefully in not such detail that you nod off).

Macleod Ganj is a wonderful place! It's in the Himalayan foothills and home to the Dalai Lama. The Vipassana meditation center is nearby, just a short 2 km further up the hill. I'd arrived a day before the course start so that I could buy a warm wool shawl and to acclimate to the elevation (it's about 2,000 km).

I really knew very little about what to expect. I know it will be for 10 days, really 12 if you count the part-days. But with a mix of excitement and trepidation, I enter the front gate.

Day 0
After registering, we go to our rooms ... uh oh! I get a visualization of what it would be like to enter a prison cell. A simple (and rock hard) bed, one pillow, one window, and fortunately blankets. Simple-mindedly, I had anticipated heat in the buildings, but not so. Not only no heat, the windows seem to be all permanently open. This is going to be COLD! There's communal bathrooms and showers and (I'm skipping on clouds) there are two western toilets. Men and women are completely segregated and I'm wondering if we'll ever see a glimpse of them. There are 22 women and we start to introduce ourselves and chatter away before the impending silence begins ... eating our evening meal (kind of a polenta with some random peas and carrots) with some weak chai (lots of sugar required).

After dinner and a short rest, we gather at the Dhamma Hall for our first instruction and mediation ... and Noble Silence begins now!

Exactly what is Noble Silence? This means so much more than simply not talking. It means silence of body, mind and speech. What does that mean? No eye contact, no smiles ... truly as though we are each alone. We were asked to turn in our pens, papers, books, and camera when we registered (not that there was any time to read or write anything anyway).

Upon beginning our meditative practice ... what did I get myself into ??? I am sitting on this uncomfortable chair, freezing, eyes closed, not moving (but everything suddenly needing to be itched), and that's not the worst. We start with listening to an instructional tape ... S.N. Goenke talking half in Hindi, half in English ... I can only understand pieces of his accented English ... he starts Hindi chanting which sounds guttural, phlegmy, coughing interspersed. There's our teacher and his wife sitting up in front facing us, not moving, eyes closed. This is downright weird!

And then my mind ... chattering monkey mind! I start singing to myself, planning the rest of my India trip, the rest of my sabbatical, my life ... heavens knows the entertainment I provided myself ... I have a whole Hollywood set going on upstairs.

Day 1
Each day is the same as any other, starting at 4 am with gong ringing and bells in the hallway (gads, do they not know this is still the middle of the night and the only thing warm is your bed). Quick teeth-brushing, face-washing, dressing and shuffling off to Dhamma Hall for a two hour mediation before breakfast.

Since we're just learning the technique, we start with a day of nostril breathing. Like you, I'm sure, I've always been rather fond of my nostrils ... but let me tell you, I'm getting rather bored with them! It's 2 hours meditation before breakfast at 6:30 am, another 3 hours before lunch at 11 am, 4 hours before tea break at 5 pm, 1 hour mediation before a 90 minute video tape by S.N. Goenke talking about Vipassana theory, and lastly about 45 minutes of final mediation of the day.

But first let me tell you about my meditating. At registration, I had asked to sit on a chair (my quads don't think sitting cross-legged is fun) and it's considered rude to have your feet toward the teacher. This is no fancy chair, rather just one of those cheap white plastic outdoor chairs you see in the states. I'm sitting there with one blanket wrapped around my waist, an even thicker wool blanket over my legs and tucked under my arms, and my red-tibetan-monk wool shawl draped over my head and wrapped around my arms. I can't see anything and it's only open enough that I have air to breath.

The cold in Dhamma Hall is punishing. Probably even more so because your core temperature plummets while meditating. Add to that, in the morning you've gone 12-ish hours without any nutrition at all.

And the noises ... people snoring, coughing, scratching, twitching, sneezing, nose-blowing. I probably shouldn't say too much since I'm sure I was doing all the same!

Day 2
Something new for today ... feeling the sensation of breath on our upper lip. Yup, that's 10-ish hours of feeling your upper lip!

I'm beginning to starve! All I can think about is FOOD! I'm delirious for prime rib and baked potato ... would probably sell my car for just one meal.

But speaking of food, let me tell you a bit about the cuisine! The expectation is that we live like monks or nuns ... in that we get food similar to what we would receive by begging. Morning is usually some sort of porridge with a very random raisin or nut (that's not plural), and frequently some fresh mung beans. There's weak chai. Fortunately, sugar and salt is left out in bowls for us to use as we like ... there's certainly no salt in the food! We take our metal plate, cup and spoon and help ourselves out of the big pots, sitting in long tables (silently of course) ... eating as fast as you can because the room is freezing and if I drink my chai quickly, I have time to get a second cup (joy of joys).

Lunch is plain cheap white rice, chapatti, dal, simple vegetable soup, boiled veggies, sliced fresh cucumbers and tomatoes, and some sort of cooked vegetables in an Indian kind of sauce. The veggies were many kinds ... cabbage, potatoes, eggplant, peas, beets, carrots, chard, green beans, tomatoes, did I mention cabbage, and cauliflower. Because onions and garlic are not conducive to meditation, there were none. Neither was there any oil or ghee (Indian butter), with the exception of one day when the veggies were cooked in the slightest drop of oil ... I almost licked my plate that day. We didn't get any chai at lunch, only cold water ... but we get a small cup of plain curd, and sometimes even one small cookie (that's an event to remember the whole day).

Dinner ... not! Only a tea break where we had the usual weak chai ... and this seasoned puffed rice with peanuts (I counted and we usually got around 20 peanuts in four spoonfuls). Yeah, we got one piece of fruit ... usually a teeny banana. Horrifying, we got this much food for tea break because we were new students ... now that I'm an old student, I'll only get hot lemon water!

Day 3
More breathing today, but now with a greater focus on a smaller area of our nostril and upper lip. Am I going to have 7 more days of nostril work? It rained all night, everything is wet and cold, I would love a shower (but my hair will never dry). I'm not sure I can really handle this, should I leave now? I've gone beyond prime rib, and now I'm dreaming of anything food related ... pizza, spaghetti with meatballs, bacon and eggs.

The excitement positively erupts! At the end of day 3, we learn that in the afternoon of day 4, we're going to learn the next step to Vipassana. I have no idea what that means, but I feel like I'm winning the lottery ... my excitement (not that I can tell anyone) is overwhelming!

Day 4
In the afternoon after lunch, we learn the true Vipassana technique. I guess the nostril stuff, was just preparing us for the real thing. My simplistic description is not going to do justice to the technique, but let me try ........

Vipassana is silent meditation. The concept is that every sensation is impermanent, and that everything is a sensation ... either a craving or an aversion. Everything manifests itself as a sensation, regardless if what it is. If you are ill, you will feel a sensation in your body if you really focus ... likewise if you are stressed or angry ... or, thinking of doing something criminal ... or, craving something such as food, alcohol, or cigarettes. There will always be a bodily sensation and a change in respiration. By focusing on your respiration, and scanning or sweeping your mind throughout your body ... from the top of your head to the tips of your toes, and from the tips of your toes to the top of your head ... you can observe the bodily sensations and by knowing that sensation is simply impermanent, layer by layer it will leave.

Interestingly enough, they have used the Vipassana technique in Indian prisons (at their worst of the worst prisons) with huge successes. I heard they have also used in US prisons, but I'm not sure where.

By the end of the day, we have heard the theory and technique, and I give it a try. Wow, this is great ... but naturally, I have to be careful not to crave the feeling, since even the feeling of meditation is only an impermanent sensation! And I suppose I should fess up that my mental Hollywood set now features singing ... the arm bone connected to the shoulder bone!!!

Day 5 and on
Sort of like groundhog day ... over and over! We get some slight variations on the theme every day, but it's really the same. It's practice, practice, practice! Now we enter the realm of "Sitting of Silent Determination" ... meaning, when we start the meditation, you cannot leave, move, or open your eyes ... nothing! Good grief, that's hard! I was sitting at the back of the room, and when I peeked out, everyone is sitting like statues (am I the only one).

Day 6
We were told this was the hardest of the days ... the day when most people leave if they're going to. By now, I'm more curious than anything about how it will all play out, so I decide to stay. But I notice there are four empty cushions by the end of the day.

What was our daily entertainment? We had a wide-screen, surround-sound, real-life Animal Planet, complete with evening sunsets ... starring the Dharmasala monkeys, with supporting cast of a few dogs, one small grey kitten, the occasional cow, and scores of eagles soaring through the Himalayan snow-capped peaks. One observed the monkeys only from a distance ... they liked to grab at your clothes and weren't the friendliest of critters. If they were in the path, usually best to find an alternative. Noisy guys though and they loved to bounce up and down on our tin roofs (sounded like a bomb was going off).

And finally the end!
After the morning instruction and meditation on Day 10, the Noble Silence ends. I surprisingly had come to enjoy the silence ... almost didn't want it to end. And we all walk out into the sunshine (along with the cold, it rained two of the days), hugging each other like long-lost friends, and immediately start chattering away. We all had been watching each other out of the corner of our eyes for so long and had so much to catch up on.

Meditation after the end of Noble Silence is most difficult ... my mental Hollywood set goes into over-drive. But we make it through, getting our last instructions. We learn that through Vipassana, all should be happy, be peaceful. We learn about the Vipassana concepts of love and compassion for all.

WOW! I have learned so much in this short 10 days. Will I be able to remember the techniques? Will I be able to continue my meditative practice? Will I be able to show love and compassion for all beings? I am so thankful that I decided to attend Vipassana while here in India. I still don't know how it has changed me or how it will change me in the future. Nonetheless, I know it has made an impression upon my life view.

Will I attend future Vipassana sessions? Now that I am an old student, I can attend any of the Vipassana sessions for shorter (or longer) time periods to refresh myself. And there are Vipassana centers world wide - even three in California (and I hear they get more and better food there).

And on day 11, after cleaning the center (toilets and all), we grab our backpacks and walk back down to Macleod Ganj where we begin to eat and talk, eat and talk, eat and talk. Will I remember Vipassana as I re-enter my real world?

Be happy, be peaceful!